Rambles...

juz finished my lunch of fried bee hoon... tring to combat the slp devil... sigh... spent my entire morn relaxin... feelin a bit guilty liao... so all the more i cannot slp in the afternn... or else i wld hav done nth at all... n exams start tml... hav to start muggin very soon liao... but i do look forward to my plans for post-promos... well... apart frm intensive PW, tt is... pple say hav to wang4 mei2 zhi2 ke3... mayb tinkin abt plans after promos will make life a little more bearable now... haha... ok... hav rambled enuf for today... hav to re-embark on intensive studyin again... haiz...
P.S: this stupid King of Chaos pop-up is drivin me crazy... :(

Bored...

cooped up at home... dun noe wad to do... gosh... i dint know my attention span was so short... mayb becos im in front of the computer... will be determined to leave the computer after this... so i can concentrate on my promos!!! argh!!! last wk wasn't in the least bit smooth for me... screwed up practically everythin i did... chem SPA, GP paper, n even my grade 8 piano exam... haha... while waiting at the studio for my piano exam... saw this nice disclaimer tt apparently was to protect the music school against any complaints abt their piano... its reads: It is the same piano tt produced distinctions n merits, but if u do not make the mark, it is by no fault of the piano. The examiner only looks at the player, not the piano. Moral: do not blame the piano, cos practice makes perfect! hmm... this is not the 1st time i've seen this liao... everytime i go for piano exams i will c this poster... smart move arh...
got very demoralized doin the maths promos papers... i guess i really nd some confidence boosters... (haha... n gl actually agreed to be one...)... guess i also nd more practices... oh yes... while im on this... there was once when my shepherd leader asked me... wad will make u feel encouraged???... i rmb my reply was very simple then... juz a word or a few words of encouragement... haha... but its really heart-warmin when u r facing a bit of discouragement n ur frens offer u some words to encourage u... i will cherish these frens forever... i promise u all a place in my heart... :)...
hmm... received this interestin n EXTREMELY meaningful msg some time ago... mayb i will juz post it on this blog so tt u all can also hav a look n tink abt this msg... " I giv to u, my fren, a bouquet of roses wif a plastic rose in the middle. N i tell u, tt our frenship will end only when all the roses hav withered..." isn't it a touching msg???

Thinkin Too Much...

Frankly speakin... i really envy those pple who can juz do wadever they think of... if they decide to do somethin... they go all out to do it... wif no hesitation at all... n its usually this kind of pple who get wad they want... cos they dare to follow their hearts... i guess i probably wont be like tt... im too cautious... i always want to hav an assurance n full confidence b4 i plunge into somethin... n tt fault always leads me to lose out in a lot of things... but sometimes... i juz cant help but do tt... mayb im afraid to engage in somethin in which i will eventually lose... or mayb... initially it was juz a false facade... n im really afraid tt i cant accept the truth... sigh... i guess im tinkin too much also now... :(
P.S: if u r ever goin to read this... well... at least u wld know wad i m goin thru now... sorry abt everythin...

Love to Hate...

A few wks ago, i heard this story from the radio broadcast... its abt Andersen's love life... well... one sentence struck me the most... " there must be love in order to hate, and the greater the love, the greater the hate..." haha... sounded very cheem to me... but i like these kind of phrases... leaves u some room for imagination... :)
Hmm... i tink this statement is really meaningful... n it does not apply to only BGR ( tho in this context, it does lah...) but rather, it applies to all kinds of relationships... dun u absolutely hate it when ur very best fren actually betrays u??? dun u hate it when ur parents dun keep a promise???... tink now... if it was juz an ordinary person who betrayed u or broke a promise... well... at most u will juz giv him a gd scoldin... or juz ignore him... but lets say some1 u love actually does tt... the hatred tt is evoked is really big... n its very to the power of n difficult to ever forgive tt person for hurtin u...
mayb i tell a bit of the story... Andersen had this lady who had a relationship wif him... this lady was an actress... n when she went overseas one day... she told Andersen to do somethin for her... but he forgot... n he was very guilty abt it... he went to c her to apologize... but the lady said tt she did not hate him... followed by the sentence: " I must love u in order to hate u..." Andersen was very very disheartened... (poor fellow...:( )...cos it was a severe shock to him tt all along... there had been no love between them... sad story...

If... but...

A lot of pple always like to say this statement: " If only I had done this, but..." Hmm... frankly, i dun tink too highly of these statements... practical-wise, wad's the use of tolkin abt wad u wld hav done when the fact is tt u dint do tt at all???... so pls dun lament abt it... n I've learned tt one shld not keep dwellin in the past... time moves on, n so do pple... so, we must also move on... There was a period of time when i kept wadlin in the waters of self-pity... i kept askin myself... "Y dint i do it tt way??? The result wld not hav been the same IF i had done tt... BUT its all too late... too late..." Haha... note the occurrence of the 2 words, if and but... It took me abt a yr to wake up frm my dream ( if it can be called a dream, it must hav been a nightmare)... n after i woke up... i was determined not to fall into it again... n i noe i wont! or is this a death trap for me???... :(

Home Alone...

Im alone at home now... my bro n sis hav gone to sch... n my parents r out at work... i like being alone at home most of the time... cos i can literally do wadever i want, eat wadever i want, n slack whenever i want ( tho slackin makes me feel guilty now, cos its nearin promos!!! Argh!!!) But wad i enjoy abt solitude now is tt i can hav time to myself, n tink abt some things in life... well... u can call me a newbie philosopher... tho i seriously wont be a great philosopher anyway... but there r juz some things in life tt is worth ponderin abt... so tt u dun lead a life full of regrets, yar... :)... the very basic qn i ask myself everytime is wad is the purpose of life... n wad hav i been doin to fulfill tt purpose... well... i c my role in life is to be a gd angel to pple... angels r supposed to care for their mortals ( tink "angel n mortal" game )... hmm... n i guess tt's one of my primary purposes in life... pple always say tt they want to live for themselves... live a life of their own... hmm... nth wrong wif tt... but pls make sure tt in the process of livin a life of ur own... u do not ruin the lives of others wif ur "smart" decisions... cos to me... pple r more impt than myself most of the time... a simple tagphrase for me wld be " if pple r happy, i m happy"... cheers!!! :)
hmm... watched "The Collateral" on teachers' day wif my sec sch classmates... n 1 sentence struck me a lot... "If some1 was to die sitting in the train... how many pple wld actually notice tt he was alredi dead???"... mayb tt's a sentence tt others can also tink abt... :)

Promises... promises

tink every1 wld hav made some kind of promise to themselves or to others at some pt or another... but sad to say... quite a number of promises r juz simply empty promises... well... mayb at tt pt of time u tot tt u wld hav the ability to fulfill tt promise... but after some time passed... well... u clean forgot abt it, or u no longer tink u hav the ability to fulfill it... haha... u might ask me y m i suddenly tolkin abt this... well... was juz retinkin abt some promises tt i made b4... to frens, family, myself... n it kinda saddens me to realize tt some of them hav not been fulfilled, or can most prob nva be fulfilled... circumstances n feelings do change... but i juz sincerely hope tt pple can make promises more carefully in the future... cos u nva know who u will hurt by breakin a promise... n how deep tt hurt can be... :)

Old Tunes...

hmm... went for CIP today at St. Luke's Hospital in Bt Batok... played a few old tunes for the elderly there... "Rong Shu Xia", " Bu Liao Qing" and "Wai Po De Peng Hu Wan"... hmm... liked the last one the best... cos it had a very nice n cute tune... :)... its a pity tt most teenagers today hardly listen to these songs anymore... not to offend anyone... but i seriously tink tt some genres of music nowadays are really CMI... well... mayb tt's juz my personal feelings lah... haha... of course, every1 is entitled to their own ideas and feelings... hmm... nth much to say now... mayb will write some more when i hav the inspiration...